5 Challenges A New Mother Must Face In The First Year
By miyosi ariefiansyah (bunda taka) - October 16, 2019
Every mother has the same opinion that having baby is not easy, especially in the first year, even if we have already read so many theories on books or journals.
I've just realized it when finally I became a mother in April 2017. I thought I have prepared so well to be a great mother. Learning about parenting from youtube and web, listening to my senior about their activities as a mother, following several classes for new mother, and taking care of my nieces are some of the examples about how I prepared myself. I also was a playgroup teacher so actually I was familiar enough dealing with children. But, when I have my own child, I've just understood that’s completely different.
At least, there are five challenges we have to face when becoming a mother. They are:
1. It’s so difficult to find “metime”
As a new mother, often, we feel exhausted by all the things we have to do every day. Changing diaper, breastfeeding, bathing and carrying baby are the examples. Our energy is absorbed like we don’t set aside time to breath. Sometimes, we also do so many houseworks. It’s so difficult to find the time to pamper ourself or we call it “metime”. Besides, having “metime” is so important for every mother to keep their sanity.
2. We get so many critics
Yes, absolutely, as a new mother, we are still amateur. We need to learn a lot. But, it doesn’t mean they can intimidate us. Every mother has their own “battle”. So, it’s not wise if they monitor and critize for every single thing we did. Giving advice is not same with critizing. Some people want us to be better, but the others just only want to show that they are better than us. As a new mother, we should need a support, not judgment. But, we can’t complain because we will be judged as weak and full of dramas.
3. We have to stand by 24 hours
Theory said that every new mother should sleep when the baby sleep. But, the fact can be different. When I just have gave birth until a few months after, I couldn't sleep well. I often checked my baby again and again. I was worried how if something happened with my son because he was still so weak. I believe that's not only me who did like this. Every new mother has the same thought. Besides, taking a rest for a while is so worthy for a new mother because the energy is so drained.
4. Breastfeeding sometimes makes a new mother stressed
I couldn't breast feed my son the first week he was born. Yes, I feel depressed. But, I was so thankful because my husband gave his best support. He said that I could produce breast milk. He also ensured me that all I need was stay calm and just relax. He was totally right. I could produce breast milk finally. Breastfeeding is the hardest part. But, We have to believe that we can do it. It sounds easy, but it's not.
5. You feel you are a bad mother
No matter what happened, we said to ourselves that we are the best mother for our son. But, sometimes we felt bad or worst without we didn’t know the reason was.
Becoming a new mother is so challenging. But, it's the amazing job in the world that can't be replaced. If you don't become a mother yet, please prepare it well. You have to know too that often the theory is not same with the practice. Don't be so perfectsionist, just prepare it well physically and mentally. Ganbatte!
Becoming a new mother is so challenging. But, it's the amazing job in the world that can't be replaced. If you don't become a mother yet, please prepare it well. You have to know too that often the theory is not same with the practice. Don't be so perfectsionist, just prepare it well physically and mentally. Ganbatte!
